What a week. A week of yin, yang and yo yo. The good, the OK and the unspeakably ugly.
I've got to write about the ugly part, just to vent.
Thank God it didn't happen to anyone in my family. It happened to a neighbor family.
Seriously, what I'm about to say is very, very disturbing. I'm not being funny here - I'm going to relate a terribly tragedy. It's bad.
The mother of one of my daughter's classmates hung herself this week. At home. MUCH worse, her son came home and discovered her body.
Now, I know a thing or two about mental illness but I simply can't fathom the depth of illness that drives a person to not only kill herself but to have absolutely no regard to the impact that would have on her kids. I mean, this woman's husband was out of town on a business trip, so OF COURSE one of her kids would find her hanging. You think that wouldn't mess the kid up for LIFE? This goes against the most lizard-brained instinct to protect your children. It boggles the mind.
Fortunately, the woman's kids' fellow students, school and entire community immediately reached out to the kids in very kind, loving, meaningful and helpful ways. People who don't even know the family have been very generous in offering up any help they can provide. I don't know the family. I only very slightly know the kid because I volunteer a lot at the high school. Just like everybody else, I want to do something, anything to help the kids. I've got to stop being so shell-shocked and start being productive.
So. If you're still reading, thank you for indulging my venting.
I promise to get back to more pleasant stuff tomorrow.
Sunday, March 1, 2009
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14 comments:
That is pretty unfathomable. Such a senseless thing to happen. So very sorry to hear about it.
That poor child.
Two years ago, the father of a boy at my children's school hung himself while his entire family was at home. This was a carefully-planned thing -- the last actions of a truly desperate man. He had been on anti-depressants for years and, without consulting his doctor or even telling his wife, went cold turkey. Bad idea.
Officially, the wife found her husband, but there is a possibility that the son found his father first and was so traumatized that he immediately blocked the whole thing out of his mind.
Yes, people were angry that the father had put his family in this situation, but as his wife repeatedly explained, he was very, very ill. He wasn't himself. He wasn't thinking about the long-term ramifications for his family, only his immediate misery.
Oh, that poor poor boy. My heart goes out to that entire family and to the community. Because, really - it affects everyone touched by this tragedy.
XXOO
jen, yeah, I've thought about the cold turkey meds angle and it's the only one that makes any sense to me.
Oh, and I want to make it clear to everybody that I'm not being judgy or anything. The poor woman must have been way beyond any place I've known and not in control in the least. Let's hope that none of us find that darkest of all places.
So incredibly sad. A neighbor of mine joined the Golden Gate jumpers a few years back. It is devastating no matter when or how.
Silver lining, I guess - no one she knew had to discover her body. It's a heartbreaking illness that drives a person that far.
Oh my goodness. People who are so sick DON'T think of others. At all. They just can't. Not that it makes it easier to absorb or less horrifying. Those poor kids.
We dealt with something similar in my family last Fall.
We are still trying to make sense of it.
It's so wrong. In so many ways.
The only thing I can come up with is that the person must have been in unbearable pain.
And still, it makes no sense.
My best to those children.
Oh my goodness, this immediately brought tears to my eyes. Not even knowing a person but knowing the amount of pain that had to have happen for all that to happen for every single family member including the mother... is heartwrenching. I feel so much for the kids. I can't believe they were put in that position. That part makes me angry. I could not imagine that kind of reality happening to anyone I am acquainted with. I don't blame you for writing it. Life isn't always lemonade, is it. :(
How unbelievably tragic. Those poor kids. Having seen many suicide scenes, that's a particularly awful way to do it, too.
A friend of a friend of mine saw someone jump off a building when he was a small boy and now, many years later he is still trying to make sense of it. He didn't even know the person involved.
A close friend of mine at schools father killed himself when we were about 14. He was found in his car by a truck driver who had to receive counselling afterwards.
My heart goes out to that child and his family.
My nephew committed suicide with a handgun as a 15 yo almost three years ago. His mom found him when she went to get him for school. It's a horrifying thing, and our family is still dealing with the downward spiral of the the aftermath. People who are this desperate simply don't think. I believe they truly think others are better off without them and cannot see the outpouring of love all around them.
God bless those children.
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